Yorkshire viewpoint # 001

King Ted

In't houses o' Parliament - London
There's latley been such a to-do
What's ended in't loss of a Kingdom
And folk's losing King Edwad too

Now it started wi' young Mrs Simpson
A Yankee lass twice a'fore wed
She came to live up i' London
And there doffed her 'at at King Ted

Now Ted were right fond o't lasses
And this one fair collared 'is eye
When they 'appened to meet in a night club
Where Ted were drinking on't sly

Now Ted were fair bowled over
She's nicest 'e'd ever seen
An if we can get rid of yer 'usband
Damn me- if I do'nt make you Queen

O.K. said young Mrs Simpson
And straightway filed for divorce
Said 'er 'usband 'aye Ted thou art welcome
I'd soon 'ave a dog or a 'orse

Now Ted knew there'd be trouble
When they heard thet 'e wanted to wed
So 'e sent for 'is young brother Albert
To see if 'e'd reign 'is stead

Now Albert were capped when 'e 'eard it
Never thought 'e would be King
Said- "Me and Liz will think it over
An' 'int mornin' 'Ill give thee a ring"

The king sent for Mr. Stan Baldwin
To come right away- without fail
And told 'im about Mrs Simpson
Said Stan- well I'm blessed- what a tale.

Thou could 'ave felled me just now with a feather
Now Ted- thou should 'ave more sense
The country will play hell for leather
And crown won't be worth eighteen pence.

But Ted said 'ed made is mind up
And I'll wed Mrs Simpson choose what
An' if thee an' the pals don't like it
I'll give up't throne on't spot.

Said Stan- "I'll go tell thee mother"
I know she'd as soon see thee dead
As wed to the wife of another
Not fit to be Queen of King Ted.

But talk as 'e did, didn't matter
King wouldn't reason at all
So without further talking and chatter
'E fetched 'is cards from Whitehall

And King sent along for 'is brother
To go up to Fort Belvedere
His sister, Princesses, and Mother
T'wer a right faml'y do, that it were.

An't Queen right upset said "say Teddy
I hope thou's not made a mistake"
But King nodded- laughed- and got ready
A trip to Venice to make.

He took off 'is crown- an't crown jewels
An' shoved 'em on young Alberts 'ead
Saying- "God save the King 'an God bless 'Im"
And that was the end of King Ted.

author / unknown --- source / Mrs Gladys Kitchen --- 14-06-96

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